Those who don't know me, I'm not really one for television. However, this morning it was there (the TV, of course) and the remote was in reach, so I thought, why not? 90 per center of Western Civilization partake in these endeavours, so why should I be any different?
What I stumbled across was this year's Brit Awards. Apart from Jarvis Cocker's sabotage of MJ's live performance, the only memory I have of this is back at the beginning of 2004 when The Darkness (remember them?) won best British Act pipping Radiohead at the post. The thing is, they probably didn't pip them at the post at all.
This blog wasn't designed to take pot shots, so I do apologise if there's any offence caused, but if ever there was a farce then surely this industry back slapping parade takes the proverbial biscuit. "It's amazing. You're amazing. I'm amazing". Is anyone else sick of people over emphasising every little fucking thing by calling it "amazing"? I sure am. James Corden? Just.what.is.going.on.there? This is a music awards presentation, not a sketch show. Lewis Hamitlon? Doesn't he drive cars? Avril Lavigne? The last time I heard of her Nick Cave was making perpetual references to her cunt in during his latest novel, The Death of Bunny Munro. Boy George? He's done nothing in 30 years! Actually, that's a good question; what the fuck has he done? Cheryl Cole? Ashley Cole, you know that spanner that plays for Chelsea Football club. You know him. You know IT!
You'd think the Arcade Fire's awards/performance was the shin dig's saving in grace however it's gone too far for any compensations of the like. The fact The National were mentioned in the same breath as Justin Beiber sums up this complete and utter joke. Mastercard's little advertisement on the podium was a nice touch, too (I've just been told they've always sponsored the event). If that's the case, then the organisation has probably been running on credit for the last 20 years. They probably even help fund Justin Hawkins's drug habit; may have paid for his rehab, too! The world of credit. Why the fuck not, let's promote it. Every other fucker's racking up or "maxing out" their bits of plastic. Let's start from the top!
So, maybe I'm the best part of six or seven years too late with this little vitriolic sprawl, but hey, I felt it needed to be said. After all, I'm not really one for television.
Words by Simon K.
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